I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize