Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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