I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
So many bounce houses so little time
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
