The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
