My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
