It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize