At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
