question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
