She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
We need to feng shui this bitch.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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