I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
