Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Its about making memories worth repressing
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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