I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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