: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
