She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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