now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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