Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
