He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize