i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
