I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
