If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
