I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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