google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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