Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
