hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
