I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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