absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
