so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
