so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
