There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
