We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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