Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
