I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
