Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
