I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize
