Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
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