So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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