you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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