Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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