I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
