I'm so fucking centered right now
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
