Will you blow on my dice?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize