I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
