They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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