I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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