How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just cropdusted the office
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
