you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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