have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
