his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
