physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
