so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Dignity is for republicans.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
