So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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